After a few hours of hiking and discussing our experiences in India, we finally engaged in the standard North American identification ritual. "So, what do you do [for work]?" I asked. She mentioned that she was a message therapist. Multiple images of all the message therapists flipped through my mind, followed by various typologies of message therapy. When she asked me what I did, and I said an interculturalist, I had to explain. "Essentially, we help people become more effective in differing cultural circumstances". Being mindful of my tendency for the abstract, I immediately jumped into what I will call here an accountable explanation. I attempted to explain the work by actually working it.
I asked her what cultural difficulties she was finding in India. She mentioned that she hated the pushiness of people. We were eventually able to move it from a characteristic of people to an actual action, which I later found to be the pushing of people while in lines and groups. "Yea they really push here don't they? So, this is an example of a cultural difference I would help people resolve."
The next question she asked, pulled me completely out of the abstract and brought my explanation to full account.
"How?'
My mind raced through various models. What is 'pushing in India' according to the Developmental Model of Intercultural Sensitivity? How could one apply Personal Leadership to pushing? Is pushing related to any factors on the Globe study?
Perhaps it was because I was spending my mornings doing meditation or perhaps it was due to my work with Personal Leadership, but I told her the trick would be to separate the act of someone placing their hand on you and applying gentle force to the thing we call "pushing". Pushing in our culture is a mild act of agression. It is an intentional act used to put someone in place. In fact many fights in the school yard start with pushing and escalate from there. Pushing in India is just something people seem to do while in groups or lines. Old ladies push, kids push, it just happens.
"But how do I separate these two things" she asks me. She was really holding my answer accountable. I felt the legitimacy of the entire intercultural field resting on my shoulders.
"Just start doing it." I answered. I surprised myself with this answer. I was thinking about it while saying it. "Start pushing in lines and see how it feels." I felt I was taking a risk with this answer. How does it relate with my studies or what I have learned in the intercultural field? But the next question would resolve it entirely.
"But I am not in a hurry, I really don't care enough to push" she said.
"That is the answer. Here pushing is not about being in a hurry, or really caring. It is just what you do. When you start pushing yourself, you will train the body to accept this."
